Imagine that you are a quadruple-amputee, and in front of you is a ladder leading above. What's above this ladder is covered up by conspicuous clouds and heavy, thick fog. But you know what exactly is above there: it's a paradise where everyone is welcome in. You see so many people with all their limbs still intact grip the handle and hastily step forward all four of their limbs while they beam a smile that could mean a million things.
You're thrilled to go up the ladder and experience heaven, so you use all your might to crawl like a snake and climb up. But unlike a snake, you aren't flexible enough to slither your way towards your goal. There are so many people who want to use this ladder, though, so one of them kicks you out of the way and go up themselves. You're ticked off, but it's fine, because you can try again. Your vision widens for a little bit, and you see other similar ladders and groups of people trying to do the same thing in the same situation. You see other quadruple-amputees like you, who hop towards the steps and fail. You tell yourself that you're not going to end up like them, no, there's no way you are.
So you try again and again, and you keep failing each time. You can't even reach the first step, no matter how high you try to hop, no matter how much you want to smoothly get to your destination. Just like with your many attempts at climbing, there are many people who kick you out of the way because you're a nuisance.
You lean on the cold, concrete wall for a bit and watch people, one by one, eagerly use the sturdy metal ladder as a tool to be in paradise. You close your eyes and think to yourself you can do it, still with the same optimism as ever.
One day, something about you changes. Your vision turns a whole lot wider. You can see the entire surroundings, everything but what's up there. In front of the ladder and behind you is a road full of speeding cars that do not want to stop. Beyond the road is a dark path, and you can hardly see anything. But it's something new to you, and you want to try to take a quick detour and see what it's all about.
Then you remember that it would be too dangerous to try going there. If you tried to cross the road, there's a very high chance a car will hit you, especially since you're a quadruple-amputee with a snail's pace. If you're extremely lucky, however, cars won't even deal you severe damage and you can take that wide, dark path.
You're not ready to die yet, you think to yourself. You're not ready to take that risk, so you focus your attention to the ladder again. Eventually, a kind-hearted person takes notice of you and tries to carry you while climbing the ladder. Halfway through, you think to yourself that when you reach paradise you will thank him whole-heartedly. Unfortunately for you, the kind-hearted man can't take the burden of carrying you because you're way too heavy for him, so he throws you back to the ground. You have a few scratches here and there, but you can't possibly blame him. After all, you're not his responsibility.
You choose to look at the second ladder, with another quadruple-amputee. That amputee is beautiful, eye-candy, with a desirable body and perfect facial structure. You are reminded of what you look like, a disgusting person with a character oozing of slime. Your body is of no use to anyone. You decide to observe intently when you see another kind-hearted person, if he truly is kind-hearted and without ulterior motive, carry that pretty amputee up the ladder. You feel pity in advance because you know he'll give up and throw her away.
Yet, he doesn't. He keeps going until he reaches that paradise.
Your heart completely sinks to the bottom once you realized that only those who are attractive will garner enough attention to be helped by a complete stranger. You see the cycle repeat again and again whenever you look at the ladders with amputees that have pretty faces and wonderful smiles, while people give up on you very easily.
The expression you're giving right now is a complete blank. You've been overcome by despair.
Ah, that's right, that road…you remember now. That road is the only option you have now. You have no choice but to take the risk.
Hop. That's what you're doing right now. Hopping towards the road that only knows danger and chance. You don't really want to do this. You don't really want to die. You just wanted to get up paradise with everyone else. That's all you wanted.
Will you be crushed by the unforgiving wheels, or will you survive and walk the path of what appears to be eternal darkness? Or will you stay next to the ladder, waiting for someone who doesn't even exist to help you?
Either way, it doesn't really matter. After all, you're just a useless quadruple-amputee.
And that's all you'll ever be.